I am afraid of facing my own future. Took me a while of thinking to come down to this ... sudden realisation. Yeah I'm a gung-ho, spontaneous person. I embrace what's around me and use that to enjoy and live my life. But then, I have never set my thoughts to what I will do in the future. Not even once. Others may be thinking of what university they would want to enter, what course. Some think even more long-term, companies they want to work for, houses/cars they want to own, how wealthy they want to be. I find nothing of that sort in this mind. And I can safely say this is the sole reason behind my lack of motivation for exams. This worries me, very much. People often tell me that I have a bright future ahead of me, but as it goes, my future prospects look pretty bleak indeed. I need something to make me work. Maybe its how I should change my way of thinking. To think long-term instead of short-term, of what would benefit me in the future instead of now. I am already turning 19, a year which marks the end of my teenage life. And its time to change some values and principles in life. Afterall, we don't stay young and naive forever. Its time to wisen up as I get older. But to think about it, its hard. My character as a person is already imprinted in me this way, and it'll be hard to change it. But hey, for the future and for the better? Maybe. Just ... maybe.

If you think about it, there's a whole lot more to life. Its just that we're so constrained by our hectic lives that we do not live our dream. I envy those in other countries who have passions and base their lives on it. Back home in Singapore, what one does to succeed is study. Nothing else. Is that truly how we want to achieve our dreams? Hard work is essential, but through that one and only channel?

Moving on to other things. This past month has pretty much been hell for me. After Revolut10n 2012 (which was a hell load of fun), I got a recurrence of my slipped disc, putting me out of floorball action for a month. Sucks, especially since my one and only passion is floorball. It really sucks watching the team train from the sidelines. I would rather be in there, training with them and suffering with them too. Ah well.

Shall touch a bit about being an OGL. It was interesting. For the first time ever, I got to lead. And it was certainly an experience not to forget :) My OG, Triton 4 was a hell of a class. Full of natural leaders and people who were damn 'on'. I liked that! Orientation was a hell lot of fun. From the start til the end! Especially going to Sentosa, and the finale night. Heh. That was a good break before starting to study!

Back to normal life, it was more about studying than anything. Stressful, and my CT talked to me about my attitude which pretty much knocked me up from my slumber and got me working harder. Its hard, but I guess with hard work the prize will come soon. :) School's been tiring, with all the studying, homework and whatever. Always having long days with minimal breaks! And then studying after school too. But I guess this is JC life. I chose it, so I can't complain (though I really want to). So yeah, A Levels year. All the waaaaaay.

In general, life hasn't been so eventful. Haven't been going out much, plus the only times I go out is to lepak with my bros. Lepak talk about life and drink teh. HAHAHA. Likka pakcik but oh well. Nice little sessions to relieve stress by talking it out with them!

Okay I've got nothing else to say. Til next time! Byeeeee.
Haziqaz.

Haven't been here in a while, have I? Miss this space. Maybe I should begin blogging again. From my phone, its really convenient. Ah well. Maybe not tonight though, its been a rough day. Cheerio!