My heart is weighed down heavily, and I fear for my form in tomorrow's match. Friday night was a time my heart really sank under, shattered. Til now, I feel it. That feeling I can't just describe, except for the disappointment and sadness I feel deep in my chest. Tonight, my dear brother, Fawwaz, will be migrating to the Middle East. He's leaving at 12, but I'll sacrifice my sleep to send off one brother who I have built such a strong bond with, both in and out of school. Sad. I really can't describe anything right now except it is all related to that word. God, help me. Make me focus and forget, for tomorrow's match against MI. We need to get into the semis. And trust me, we will.

Vicky.

There is no other way to live life, other than with minimal regrets.

I figured it'll always be better to release my frustration and anger in floorball, but I just realised today how wrong I was. Today MS Victoria School played against a team called Fat Boys Slimming, and we won by a narrow margin of 4-3. They were quite a tough team, with big and fast players. And they were one of the rare teams in Div 3 who had commendable technical skills. So anyway, we were leading throughout the match so it was a good game played. Although I was really really disappointed with my performance today. I tried my best to focus in the match. I got my head in the game, but my heart didn't want to play. There was just this really heavy feeling in my heart. I played without my heart today, and I totally lost my calmness and composure in the game. That resulted me in getting a 2-minute penalty and with it, my team conceded the third goal. It was totally my fault. :/ But anyway after that, some of us went over to Food Culture and lunched together. Then 168 back to Tampines together.

During that short 'outing' with them I discovered a whole lot about the current VS teams and the politics going on. And truthfully, I'm really disappointed with how they treat the VS floorball team and Mr Amir. Its true what Mr Amir said, they deserved that 10-1 loss in the final to wake them up to their senses about their imperfections and stop being so cocky. A team with two sides honestly, is not a team. Look at the team in '09, how bonded we all were. And look how we gave those Merahans a run for their money. Thats why I entrust my juniors to pull the B Div team next year, and hopefully without getting any trouble from the usual idiots on the team. Come on, what the hell are you all trying to do. Smoking, getting into all kinds of shit. Smoking will certainly just kill your stamina and fitness. Its not even cool. I know each and every one of you who smoke so if I hear anything more about it, promise me none of the old boys will give you a good time. And all the politics in the team ... Mr Amir has given so much to VS floorball, even spending his own money on equipment for the school team. The school doesn't give that much money to buy all the boards, etc. At least give back to Mr Amir what he has given and sacrificed for the team. Even quitting coaching at RP so that he could concentrate on you guys. Mr Amir is a good coach, whatever you guys want to say. He made so many of us from nothing to something. Just ask any old boy, they will agree.

Vicky.

Today, today, today. Bad day, a really bad day. How worse can a day get? Two really unfortunate things happened to me today, but for the sake of privacy it is something I shall rather not blog about. Just that my life is gonna be really miserable and tough these next few days. So sorry in advance, if I do anything wrong. Today is seriously the worst day to get any shit in life. Especially with my div 3 match tmr, and both the A' Div quarter finals matches on Monday and Wednesday next week. But hey, I guess thats life the way I live it. It'll affect me, but I do not know how. There is so much anger waiting to be released, maybe it'll be of use in the matches.

So anyway today after school, I went for VJ trainig for a little while. Then I walked over to VS for the Victoria Skools friendly match with MJC. It was a really good match, and we played really well. Won them 13-4, and I scored two goals. From defence some more. :) I love Victoria Skools floorball. So much in fact, I am seriously considering dropping out of combined schools to play for VS. These are players I already have a bond with, and can play well with. Combined schools is full of people I don't know and people with different talents and skills in floorball, just trying to show off that they're the best to fight for the space in the team. But then again, the benefits of playing for combined schools; colours award, trip to australia for the girls' APAC this year, and lastly being able to play for APAC next year. I'll miss out on a lot of opportunities if I quit combined schools, but my loyalty is still with Victoria Skools. Oh, and a slightly less important note that VS is playing in the top division league in singapore, while combined schools is in div 2. I really don't know hoooow. :/

And I still don't know why you did such a thing to me, _____.
Vicky.

As you move into new stages of life, you neglect things around you. Friends, family, proper rest. And now, I've neglected my blog! The last time I posted was daaaaays ago. Frankly because I have no time, or when I do have time I just do not feel like blogging. So how shall I describe the past 18 days.

Trainings, competitions, lectures, tutorials, long breaks, short sleep.

Trainings keep me occupied every single day. If its not floorball, its hockey. If its not for VJC, its for VS old boys or Combined Schools. Yes, I commited myself to four teams. So I might say that all the fatigue and my worn out body stems from all these trainings. VJ floorball trainings are pretty tiring, a lot of running. And the physical .. Wow. VJ hockey is a tad more enjoyable. I don't know why but I'm starting to enjoy hockey a lot more than I used to. Maybe its the nice company, maybe its just the way hockey is played. But yeah having training with the hockey guys is fun! Be it stickwork, or physical. VS old boys training is supeeeeeeeeer intensive but I don't feel tired during the training, I'll be running so much and only feel the pain in my thighs after training. I think cos mainly the company there is great. All my seniors like Afiq, Shukri, Faizal, etc. And they are like damn good. I improve a lot when I play with them, seriously. In terms of gameplay, passing and others. Like woaaaaaah. And they aren't even in their Div 1 modes yet. Hahaha. And we've had a few friendlies and the recent one was a match against OneWest Spartans, and we won them 27-10. :D I scored 3 beautiful goals. Woo! :D As for combined schools, I won't really say the guys there are like woah. Only some are good, and especially when we saw some of the merahans play yesterday. There were about 30-40 people yesterday and apparently nobody was cut from the team. But some guys got called out and asked to buck up by the next training, I think? Yeah. Unfortunately I don't think I can go for the next training because ... Well that leads me to the next point.

Competitions!

Oh yeaaaaah. My A' Div hockey tournament has been awesome so far. I missed the first match against NJC due to illness but the team won 4-0. The second game was against TPJC, and I played the full game as a right back! Haller. We won then 2-0. And just recently, we had the toughest fixture in the group stages against Innova. Played at right back again, and special mention goes to Joseph for coming at half-time in left-back and doing a greaaaaaaaaaat job! So yeah, it was a really tough match but we had LOADS of chances. We won 1-0 courtesy of a beutifully done drag-flick by Raj, our captain. But seriously, we should have scored a lot more. Our midfield, wingers and forwards did a very very very good job. We're through to the quarter-finals! Next match against MI on Monday, and ACJC on Wednesday. A day's rest on Tuesday! Thats gonna be really tough.

Another competition is the NUS floorball tenses we played last Saturday. Damn, that was a good day despite us getting only 3rd. We won NYJC 3-0 and MI 10-1 in the group stages. I scored a goal in each match. :D Then we were pooled into the same group as NUS and NUS Alumni. As they call it, the "Champions League". The top 3 teams from all the group stages. So yeah, we played against the Alumni first and sadly to say, we lost 5-1, despite playing what I think was a really good game. They were Div 1 players! I think we played well. Then against NUS, we lost 1-0 which was reallyreally sad. We could have got 2nd place! But it was a good effort, really.

School!

Hahaha school has been cool so far. I mean, lectures are complicating. Especially chemistry! D: I suck at chem. Breaks have been the normal, eat or go to the computer labs. Although I'm starting to study during my breaks because I seriously miss out a lot of lessons due to matches and sickness. And I'm going to miss a lot more matches when floorball season starts. And after school, I have absolutely no time to study so all I have are breaks. And in terms of friends ... Well I haven't really been making much progress. HAHA. Its like I'm so busy with work or hockey or floorball I can't find time to socialize. This, coming from haziq? (x Yeah but its pretty much true. And some people are seriously making my time in vj very ... assholic. Ohwell.

I haven't updated in agesssss. Been really busy haha. This week was pretty hectic, with me falling sick, and other stuffs. Bleargh really. I can't remember all that happened this week because it just passed in a flash and all I remember are random stuff during lessons. HAHA. Lessons have been confusing, to say the least. Can't really get stuff into my head. But the company has been great! Like I'm getting to know more and more people and its embarrassing to know that people know your name and you don't know theirs. Hahaha. Oops? (x Otherwise school has been fine, really.

Soooooooo what else is there to talk about. Oh yes, yesterday we had a friendly match against RI(JC). It was a really tough fight. After 3 periods, we only succeeded in getting the scoreline to 2-1. In the final period though, we managed to get 5 goals in to make the score 7- 1. It was a really high-intensity match, full of action. But what was agreed was that the match was a game won by a group of only 9 players, the capt and vc, the 2 keepers, and the rest were the appeal and DSA guys. We huffed and puffed for the team but the others did not contribute much. In the end  the coach put in us 9 guys only for the last 2 or 3 periods. It was really really tiring. I guess the other guys need more exposure to playing in games. But anyway it was a really nice game that I played. One of the highlights was when one of the forwards went on 1v1 with the keeper and I sliced in at the perfect timing before he shot to save our skins lol.

OH YES I almost forgot. On wednesday, marshall, afi and me went for combined schools trials! Met akmal, chee yong and daniel lim there. The trials were okay. I discovered that quite a few schools have started out on floorball now. Good to know that floorball is expanding in singapore. (Y) So yeaaah after like 3 hours of trials the names of the people who would go though the next round of selection got called out and I went through! Happy happy. :D Oh, so did afi, marshall, chee yong, akmal and daniel lim. Haha what can I say, BAIK AH VICTORIA!!!

Okay, now back to resting.
Vicky!